Crop circles are Chuck Norris' way of telling the world that sometimes corn needs to lie down.
The quickest way to a man's heart is with Chuck Norris' fist.
Chuck Norris invented Kentucky Fried Chicken's famous secret recipe, with eleven herbs and spices. But nobody ever mentions the twelfth ingredient: Fear.
If you spell Chuck Norris in Scrabble, you win. Forever.
Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because he only recognizes the element of suprise.
How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could Chuck Norris? ...All of it.
For some, the left testicle is larger than the right one. For Chuck Norris, each testicle is larger than the other one.
Chuck Norris once worked as a weatherman for the San Diego evening news. Every night he would make the same forecast: Partly cloudy with a 75% chance of Pain.
Chuck Norris does not own a stove, oven, or microwave , because revenge is a dish best served cold.
Chuck Norris recently had the idea to sell his urine as a canned beverage. We know this beverage as Red Bull.
Google won't search for Chuck Norris because it knows you don't find Chuck Norris, he finds you.
Nagasaki never had a bomb dropped on it. Chuck Norris jumped out of a plane and punched the ground.
Contrary to popular belief, the Titanic didn't hit an iceberg. The ship was off course and accidentally ran into Chuck Norris while he was doing the backstroke across the Atlantic.
Chuck Norris once kicked a horse in the chin. Its decendants are known today as Giraffes.
Chuck Norris does not have to answer the phone. His beard picks up the incoming electrical impulses and translates them into audible sound.
so from now on, chuck norris is my hero. *giggles*
there's a whole load so i' m gonna go read it now.
the first one has to be my favourite.. it's so incredibly cheap looking but it's funny alright.